I am all for reading a lot of books, listening to inspirational speeches, taking advices from people close to me. To be honest, that is how i spend most of my day, reading, listening, learning,observing. I believe all this exterior knowledge is very useful for our self discovery and growth, but trough a lot of trial and error in absorbing all that information, I have discovered to adapt, what I call, a filter. By filter, I mean, I have learned to sift and sort trough all that information and see, what is working for me and what is not, because before I just believed everything I read, and jeez, I read a lot. At times it could get very overwhelming because every book I read I though, wow this is the best book I've read and I adapted that information in my life as 100% truth. Might not sound that bad. It means I'm passionate, right? Mm, maybe, but more so, I feel like I was letting that knowledge create my life, instead of being in charge myself. I stopped believing that everybody knows better then me, what is better for me, and started to realise that I know more then I think. After all, what is true for one person might not be true for you.
Earlier I said it took me some trial and error to learn the best way of taking in the information, and it still does, but I am much more aware of it now. So let me briefly describe couple of examples to show you more clearly what I mean by that. The first one is actually about my last article, and if you haven't read it, it was about Ego and observing. After writing it I did my best to follow what I suggested: just observe everything around you, don't react to anything, good or bad, don't think, just watch. Buddhists call that, practising mindfulness. So I went all in, because for me it's very important to have weight to my words, meaning I want to walk my talk.
Few days into practising just observing, I realised I wasn't really all that happy. Some questions arouse: Is this really what bliss feels like? Isn't it kind of like being a vegetable, no thoughts, no reactions? After all we are here living human experience, and one of the benefits is using our minds and feelings. I really like to think and create with my mind. I love to imagine. I love to say wow, if I see something I like. So this all mindfulness thing is bullshit? Not so fast! This is where sifting and sorting come in, this is where my filter came in very handy. I realised all or nothing approach wasn't working for me here, but I can't say its bullshit either. It is far from that. Mindfulness is a great practise, but just not all the time. After all we weren't born, at least I wasn't born to meditate my life away. But it taught me a lot, and I definitely will keep applying it into my life, and suggest you try so as well. Mindfulness taught me to not be so reactive to negative stuff happening around me. It taught me to do everything from a very balanced place within. It taught me to be more unconditional and know that happiness is within, not the external. I learned to be more present and grounded, as well as learning to quiet my mind is a great benefit. I decided to see it as a cup half full, rather then half empty. I understood that I can take what works for me, and leave out what doesn't. Realising that, I felt big smile coming back, and my mind was clearer then ever. I took responsibility for my life, rather then just following somebody else's opinion.
Other example where my filter showed me some great results, after some time of course, is when I decided to become a Vegan, and yeah it happened after reading just one book. Don't laugh! Ok, ok you can laugh. Again, I went 100% into applying the information and though, wow this is the best book I've read. My boyfriend is probably smiling now, because, wow, I was serious about it, and I have to say I wasn't happy with his reaction. Now it all makes me smile, but back than I was just so confused. My boyfriend asked me so many questions about the topic, which I couldn't answer, and it made me very frustrated. But deep down I knew it wasn't his fault, I was angry at myself because I really didn't know why I was doing it. Just because this guy said its good for you? I again just blindly went into taking other person's opinion as 100% truth for myself. A month after that, I started to go to gym and realised I felt hungry, and I wasn't really happy anymore. My energy levels were low. Should I send all this Vegan thing to hell? Again, not so fast.
I love to see every experience as a learning one. So what have I learned? That month i was Vegan i realised everything is possible. Before I would never imagine saying no to cheese. It taught me that i can do whatever I put my mind to. It taught me to eat much cleaner, and acted as a reboot for my system. It is very easy for me to make healthy choices now, concerning food and life in general. It taught me to connect to my body on a deeper level, and feed it the best, so it can function the best.
You probably can see the connection between the two examples. It's not about not reading, it's not about trying something and then giving up all together, because it didn't work. It is about reading and using the filter. It is about believing that deep down you know whats best for you. It is about you taking your power into your own hands and finding out what works for you. Learn from others, but don't follow everybody, create your truth. After all what works for one might not work for the other. Have fun with it!
Thank You
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